Earlier this year, a friend (let's call her Pamela) needed the lock on her front door replaced. Here's the sequence of events, as told by her (apologies there are no photos to go with this story):
Noon on said day, locksmith arrives, noticeably empty handed
12.30 locksmith decides a new lock is required
(which in itself is a stroke of genius given he was instructed 3 hours earlier to place new locks on the door!)
13.00 locksmith requests an extortionate rs2000 for a replacement lock
13.01 locksmith goes to the market, Pamela goes out
15.00 locksmith returns with lock in hand
(yes folks that's right, it takes 2 hours to obtain a lock!)
16.00 Pamela arrives home
16.01 Pamela goes and I quote f*cking apeshit end quote
16.02 Pamela realises the the reason she is going apeshit is because the locksmith has attacked the door frame with a hammer and chisel to have the door fit the new lock!
16.02.05 Pamela notices that the new lock however is for a door hinged on the opposite side. But that's ok, he has installed it upside down!
16.03 Pamela notices that for some inexplicable reason, there are live electrical wires hanging out of the door lock and are sparking as they rub together in the wind she is generating through the sheer force of her fury!
16.05 Pamela walks away telling him to fix it
19.30 YES.... three and a half hours later!!!! Pamela walks into the hallway, and as calmly and as nicely as she possibly can, says quote you need to f*cking fix this and then f*ck off end quote
20.30 The carpenter, who was originally asked to do this job, but was too busy earlier and also hadn't cleared it with his boss, arrives, removes the new lock, puts the old lock back on the door
21.15 the tradesmen leave the house
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