best photo ever courtesy of Lynden C
restaurant sign 
shoe shop (shoes delivered via ceiling hole)
I carry a notebook everywhere I go, just jotting down notes, visions, sights, facts, thoughts, experiences .. even the girls have started to ask me to write their random thoughts down .. the following are just some of my observations....
Today I’ve just discovered is that flash mobs are illegal in India! In 2003 in a Mumbai shopping mall, the first flash mob was organised .. apparently, if my sources are correct, very soon after that legislation was passed which made it a criminal offence “for any collective of more than four people for a common cause within the city to meet without prior police permission”!
I’m wondering how they could ever imagine to police that rule, having seen Indian wedding processions, queues at bus stops, hoardes of men at the spice markets and generally lazing about on the side of the roads, masses of teenagers congregating at shopping malls or in bazaars ... it would seem totally unforceable wouldn’t you think?
Apparently it’s also illegal to sell or consume alcohol or tobacco near academic institutions!
I’ll keep digging to find more ahem “interesting” rules, please let me know if you can confirm any of them.
- Saw a bus driver light up a fag whilst driving a school bus and a builder jackhammering wearing sandals.
Can’t get used to little girls, toddlers & babies wearing kohl around their eyes!Few signs we’ve seen:
- Friend Nicky saw a building called “Welfare for Backwards Learning”
- There’s a school in Nizamuddin called “Delhi International Happy School”
- On a bus advertising a “cervical magnetic pillow”
- Updation eg; “we need an updation to this status report”
- Ideation & Empanelment
- Needful ... Dean’s pa sent me an email saying “they will coordinate with you and do the needful thing” (fixing the bubbled sunfilm on our car).
Upgradation ... why use a small word like upgrade when you can add a few more letters?
and everyone's personal favourite ... prepone. Yup, that's the opposite of postpone! so one can prepone a meeting or appointment (as in bring it forward), or yup, you guessed it, prepone the needful on the upgradation!
- Indian fireworks are dodgy and therefore dangerous! Short wicks and rockets that change trajectory mid flight and end up shooting off horizontally! Packaging is hilarious too (what’s with the socks on the chick in the suit?).
- No-one at Dean’s work has heard of Elvis or Star Wars.
- Ordered spag bog in a funky new cafe .. waiter asked if we wanted “chicken or veg” bog, despite there being only beef spag bog on the menu!!!!!
- Back in July this year, India launched its first nuclear-powered submarine, becoming one of just six nations in the world to have successfully built one. This in itself is a huge worry given they can’t even build houses and toilets that don’t leak!
cooking sweet potatoes on his head WHILST walking- Showercaps make great rain protectors for turbans
- Think I’ve finally got the electricians to fix the shower .. the one that we keep getting electric shocks in.
- Ganesh our cook gave Emmaline a full glass of cordial (squash) .. undiluted and he wanted the recipe for a Betty Crocker packet cake mix.
- Lemons & limes seem to have swapped bodies.
- We were recommended a masseuse who had practiced for 42 years, he was also a chiropractor ... his skills learned from a book sent from an American friend!!!
- Here we have ring pulls in cans, men to bag up your shopping & carry it for you, service station attendants, lift operators and, yes ... cows at the movie ticket counter!!!!
hmmmmmm what's showing? 
I'm not going if I can't go Gold Class .. no way, I'm outta here
- We saw a bouncy castle & pirate ship in a slum.
- After 3 months here my tummy is still not happy .. but I haven’t yet beaten my famous “throw up outside the school gate on the first day”!
There is way loads of good stuff in this post ... but you have me comflustered .. you THREW up outside the gate on the first day of school?????
ReplyDelete